i wish i had a beach house

Laneway already feels like nothing more than a wonderful dream I had a few nights ago. This is Soufi's Kak Emma, Soufi, Fifa and me taking a second from our dancing to pose for a photo during Austra.

Hello.

Do you like yourself?

I need to learn to like myself. 

Last

Last weekend we celebrated Nidia's birthday early with a picnic at the Botanic Gardens!!! We played Jenga and Taboo and ate pasta and cupcakes and Awfully Chocolate birthday cake with new people. It was fun :-)

Soufi also got the photos from the Lykke Li show develeoped at last.

Timecheck: 1.17 a.m. I have been trying to gradually ease myself into a normal sleeping pattern because being nocturnal was making me look and feel extremely sick. Health should be more precious than those magical hours between 2 a.m. and sunrise, right..? Right.

I think my face has changed quite a bit since September...

333

Am currently lying down next to a sleeping Soufi A'aliyah at her place. I can't sleep yet because I have only been up for twelve hours, so this is me trying to find something to do so my mind can grow tired. In another twelve hours or so, we are celebrating Nidia's birthday with a picnic at the Botanic Gardens. I am excited because it sounds like we are going to have the prettiest picnic ever. I love pretty picnics. Anyway, Soufi and I have a really special present for our birthday girl and we are now "the coolest friends ever" according to @lanewayfestsg ;-) Aww shucks. Thursday evening was a good evening spent with Syadza, and later Afifah, at Vivocity. We did some shopping because a lot of the stores were offering good sales discounts and it was so hard to resist! I bought myself a David Bowie t-shirt from Zara + two necklaces from Topshop for a grand total of $33. The original price would've added up to about $80. Pretty damnnnn worth it if you ask me. At night we had junk food on the windy rooftop of the building. It was quite lovely. So was seeing my lovely Syadza, who is always there for me :-) Well. I think I am tired now. Goodnight.

Childhood

I found a pile of random photos yesterday. My mother must have taken these. I was probably around five here. I feel all sad and nostalgic now. 

Kindergarten best friend whose name I cannot remember. I miss all the hand-holding. I have always been smaller than my peers hahaha.

Lul was I flirting?

That's my grandma. My baby brother's face is so precious in all of these photos. I think I have always had dark circles.

This was under our favourite tree in my old magical Tanjong Pagar estate. This tree was always shedding its flowers. They'd twirl like little pink helicopters as they fell and we would see who could catch the most before they touched the ground. It was free for all when a big gust of wind blew.

Right beside this tree was block 103. On the second floor lived an old couple. The husband always said hi to us  from his window if he saw us, and would throw sweets and snacks down hahahahaha. One time he made a trip to the first floor because he couldn't throw the can of Qoo he wanted us to have.

We always got really excited when we found these.

The amphitheatre behind the playground that we played at every evening with the other kids. I was 'Rosemary' for many years to the boys there hahaha I don't even know why.

Our little pond we fussed over and loved and kept fishes in, some of whom were suicidal and made me really sad.

PS I am sorry for the quality! My scanner is pretty shit after almost six years.

Glassy-eyed

Seriously lacking in sleep because I keep getting impulses to do things like this ^ at 3 in the morning. Lul I don't know what a blue hat is doing there. I was tired and not thinking and I regret it. The colours are much richer irl. I can't scan this thing. Need a camera.

I think I've drawn this girl before. Maybe an older version of her, but she has the same sad eyes.