Saturday, 28 April 2012

Want to stick pins in my eyes and nails and gums and feet and scalp and shoulders and then roll down a hill, off a cliff and into a pit of fucking lava.

I had a happy afternoon with friends Syadza and Maya, but night fell and I have been thinking and I have been beating myself up for running away from everything and everyone and I am sorry if I have been distant and distracted and lol maybe I am just getting my period soon but man my feelings suck and I hate how my reflex action to anyone caring or anyone needing me at all is to back away and bubblewrap myself in thick layers of detachment. I don't want bubblewrap. I want bruises and cuts, and pins in my eyes and gums and nails. But I don't know. Been bubblewrapping my whole life I don't know how to stop.

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